Blogpost 2: Fear of Being Rejected

Alone? Yes we don't want to be alone even though you can say to others that it's okay to be alone but you know to yourself that you don't want to be a loner. We want to have friends that will entertain you, listen to you, help you, love you and most of all to be with you when you are in the darkness days of your life. All of us are afraid of being rejected because it can affect ourselves. One situation is when we are at school, like it's the first day of the class and you don't know each other then you want to make friends with him/her but suddenly your mind is reacting if you will be rejected that will cause you to stop or having doubts to talk to your classmates. The other thing is about love. Commonly, the boys are the most who got rejected if courting someone because I know the feeling that when you exert all your efforts to it and when the girl decline to your proposal, it is really annoying but deep inside it is a scar to us. Let's not be sad of this thing, just think that she lost someone who really loves her.

Being rejected is one of the intense fears that we have because we can feel the hurt or pain that have an impact to us. Psychologically, we are afraid of how the person will react to us. I have read an articled entitled Deconstructing the Fear of Rejection: What are we really afraid of? by John Amodeo from the website www.psychcentral.com. He discussed about the feeling of being rejected.

Rejection is common in our society now, even about jobs, love, friendship, social networking and many more so that's why it became a intense fears of humans. We're afraid of having our image seen in a bad way. We are worried of being alone and we want a change in our life. Sometimes, when we got rejected by someone, we think about ourselves that we're not funny, enjoyable, worthy, not lovable or intended to be alone. But it doesn't mean that we're a failure already. This is the one step for us to be more better. Everybody can change. Face this fear, because this is a part of our challenges too. Don't stop because you got rejected, be strong and say to yourself that I can't be like this forever, I will change and I will be better! Another problem in our world right now is in our society. Yes, we fear of being rejected because of the people itself too. Why? Because many people are choosy or picky right now. If they don't want your attitude, image or background, they will not take an action to become friends with you. That's the problem in our world now, I mean yes, we must not make friends with bad people, but innocent people? That's not the same. Even though they don't have the quality we want, what's the matter? Did you know him/her already deeply? No right? So why do we choose? If we're all equal.

John Amodeo said to his article that "Being human, we long to be accepted and wanted" Everybody wants to be accepted and wanted. We're all humans and we are equal. If we can't accept the others, that means we can't accept ourselves too. And for those people who always rejects people intentionally, someday you will know the feeling of it and you can say to yourself that I regret rejecting people already.

The second article I've read entitled How to deal with Rejection by Dr. Carmen Harra from the website www.huffingtonpost.com. She discussed about how we can face our fear of rejection.

Rejecting something can sometimes happen everyday. Like rejecting the food that it served already, the clothes that are prepared to us, the transportation that we will ride on and most especially the beggars that we are passing by when we are walking. Being rejected is an ferocious or direct attack in the heart already. And that's why we accuse ourselves that there's something bad or wrong to us and we think about why we are being rejected. Rejection is most common in love. But the funny thing is, why in love even we're rejected, we still don't give up (sometimes) but when it comes to the other situations already, we easily give up. I hope all the situations that we're being rejected, let's think about love and never give up. Let's not take it so personally. If we don't have an emotions about it, their rejection is nonsense to us and we can't learn from that fear.

Dr. Carmen Harra said to her article that "Rejection offers us an opportunity to evolve through and learn from our experiences." This means that let's not be afraid of rejection. Rejection can be the way for us to change. It gives us the opportunity to be a better us and this will be path for us not to be rejected again.

We're afraid of what might people will think of us if we talk to them. But whatever it is, we must try no matter happens. If you got rejected, stay strong and let this lead you to success.